Thinking Positive: ExchangeIt! Coaching

I want to take a minute today to reflect on one of the amazing things that I heard yesterday at Easter dinner. My cousin (well, really my first cousin once-removed I think...), who is an amazing mother of two very successful, intelligent, athletic, and faith-driven children, just started her own business. She's one of the most passionate people I know, both caring and charismatic, and every time I talk to her it reinforces to me that it really is possible to go through a lifetime of ups and downs but still remain - at heart - a truly good, giving, and faith filled woman. 

Her new business very much strikes a chord with me, especially given some of the hardships I've had to face over the last couple of years, and about some of the self-doubts I've had with regard to my career, with my personal life, and with myself in general. If you know me at all, you know I'm peppy and optimistic about just about everything there is, but it doesn't mean the other stuff isn't there too. And we all need a way to deal with difficult situations and challenges - whether they're simple day-to-day irritations, or big life-changing decisions.

Anyways, long story short, here's the premise of her company: "exchanging" the negative for the positive when faced with challenges. 

(Because, let's face it, how many of you when you get an irritating email or a text just shoot back a response that you - five minutes later - really wish you wouldn't have sent?)

ExchangeIt! Coaching

ExchangeIt! Steps

1) Pause it!™
Take a deep breath, relax your shoulders and look around at your surroundings. Become aware & take control of the thoughts running through your head. Ask yourself, “am I ready to feel better or do I just want to complain?” Get a gauge on what you are feeling right now. Realize you have a choice of how you are going to react to the situation. Do not react emotionally to the challenge right now.

2) Accept it!™
Accept the situation for what it is. Wishing things to be different than they are will create a negative emotion. Accepting a situation as it is allows you to problem solve without anxiety being involved. Put the situation or challenge into perspective. You do not have to agree with the situation, you just have to accept that it is happening. Have a solution oriented mindset and move forward without anxiety.

3) See it!™
How do you see this problem being solved? Is this a vision that you are control over or are you trying to change someone else into doing what you want them to do? We are only in control of our own actions. What steps do you see that could help the current situation? Give 1-2 examples of some options that may work. The situation may not be exactly how you want it to be so what is a step that can move you in a better direction right now?

4) Speak it!™
What is your action plan and next immediate step? Say it out loud in a way that is "repackaged" into a positive action plan. Set it to paper; write your goals down. Is there a possible learning lesson in the challenge? Tell your friends and family how you are going to make your challenge better. Speaking positive words to others around you will help you to make your action plan come to life.

5) ExchangeIt!™
Look back at your original challenge and see how far you have come in a short period of time, you exchanged a stressful thought or emotion into a situation you have either accepted or turned into a positive action plan. You now have perspective, a goal oriented solution and some options that will allow you to work free of anxiety. Great work! 

PASS through to ExchangeIt!

For me at least, the most important one of these is the very first. Whatever you're doing - however you're provoked or upset - pause and take a breath. Everything that Renee has said here is true: you're in charge of the choices in your life. You can choose to react to situations, and thereby let others control your life, or you can choose to respond thoughtfully, putting you in control of your own feelings and decisions. You've got to own it. 

Life-Coaching

I never bought into the idea of life-coaching, per se, but she makes a good point here in the way that it stresses moving forward: 

Life Coaching is motivational, inspiring, encouraging and result oriented. It’s different from traditional therapy in that the focus is on the present and future rather than the past. It focuses on goals, behaviors and action oriented solutions. We often look to everyone on the outside to solve our problem; life coaching is different in that instead of having someone tell you what they think the answer is, a life coach asks the appropriate questions to find the answers already inside of you.

Remember: keeping your mind and soul healthy is just as important as your daily exercise regimen or thinking about what you put into your body!
 

Thanks for Reading!
CJ

Baby Steps: Goal 2

Exercise for at least 20 minutes per day. 

I realize it's not actually that hard. I'm just exceptionally lazy, and I hate the gym. So it's tough for me.

I'm thin, yes. But am I fit? Absolutely not. And frankly, the only reason I'm writing this down is so I have some kind of verbal commitment to myself to stop wasting time and start working on toning my body.

What am I unhappy about? My lack of a toned stomach (no, I don't need "abs", but I also don't like the layer of extra fat that I see there) and my total inflexibility.

So, audience that likely doesn't exist, I am going to commit to a daily exercise regimen, with only 1 rest day a week.

Here are some of the options that I have:

1. 30 minutes on the elliptical at my apartment gym.

• Pro: it's downstairs and I have no excuse not to go.
• Con: it's the elliptical. It's ridiculously boring.

2. Going for a nice walk!

• Pro: this is my favorite. The boyfriend and I did a 22 mile walk over the summer in DC and it was amazing. 
• Con: It's February and my fingers/toes will freeze off. No thanks.

3. 30 minutes of Pilates. 

http://www.totalfitnessdvds.com/Easy-Pilates-DVD-with-Ana-Caban-p/1111.htm

• Pro: I really like the video! Ana Caban is a great instructor and it actually helps with my flexibility.
• Con: There's not really one. I'm just lazy.

4. 20 minutes of (free) Yoga.

www.yogadownload.com 

• Pro: It's free. And helps a lot with flexibility and relaxation.
• Con: I have no idea if my positioning is right, and I pay much more attention to that than actually relaxing and letting it "flow". Also, going to a "real" class is quite pricey, and not in my budget right now. 

My other option? Learning how to be a big girl and use weights at the gym. 

I did go to a CrossFit class a few months ago that was great - it's just not within my comfort level for working out when I'm in front of a lot of other people, even if it is healthy competition. I just think I'd be happier knowing how to do all of that myself in the comfort of my judgment-free empty apartment gym. Perhaps a new blog topic will come about as I figure out some good free weight exercises to do...

Tomorrow starts day 1 of this new goal, so wish me luck!

Thanks for Reading!

CJ

Baby Steps: Goal 1

I have some fairly lofty goals, starting this blog. Health, Fitness, Happiness. They aren't necessarily "quantifiable" goals, so I'm going to start setting some to get me there.

Here's my first daily goal:

Drink 3 bottles (or 60 oz.) of water every day

It seems like a small change, but I always forget. I'm running around at work, grabbing a cup or two of coffee, and not focusing on anything but work. It's not the most enthralling or interesting thing to drink, but the health impacts it has are enormous! The ones below are the top 3 for me:

1. Better Productivity at Work: Your brain is 90% water (I didn't know that until this post!), so keep that engine functioning well, and you'll be more productive. You'll also be less likely to have headaches!

2. Relieves Fatigue: "Water is used by the body to help flush out toxins and waste products from the body. If your body lacks water, your heart, for instance, needs to work harder to pump out the oxygenated blood to all cells, so are the rest of the vital organs, your organs will be exhausted and so will you." 

3. Better Skin: Ladies (and men), listen up. Your skin is 70% water. Water helps keep your skin moisturized, maintain its elasticity, and helps it replenish skin cells and tissues. So you can pay $300 per ounce for a gold-infused, chemical sounding anti-aging cream (No Joke)...or you can drink some water. Tough call. 

A great tip I've seen is to have a cup of warm water with lemon (juice of 1/2) in the mornings before the day starts. Perhaps that'll be better to have in my thermos driving to work instead of the requisite coffee!

Most Information Courtesy of:

• Benefits of Drinking Water
• 13 Suprising Benefits of Water (Ladies' Home Journal)

Thanks for reading!

CJ

(PS: I'm already on bottle 2, and it's only 11AM!)